Comparing to others is very common but it causes a minority complex and brings stress to your life. Learn how to stop it now.
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This article will teach you why comparing to others is so harmful and what tools you can use to stop this practice
The Drawbacks of Comparing to Others
We are living in the rat race era. Competition at work, in business, at school or even in your family has created a disastrous environment that lowers your vibration and proliferates minority complexes and low self-esteem.
You forget to believe in the fact of being the wonderful child of the Universe, with a unique soul plan. You may even be angry at your soul because of your chosen path for this lifetime.
So comparing to others generates stress and all the batch of negative emotions. And of course. stress is always a negative phenomenon in your life because your body does not regenerate and fight infections efficiently.
So then you catch Hashimoto and other auto immunologic diseases, blood pressure rises, eating for comfort and workaholism become your daily routine. Add sleep deprivation, plus deteriorated harmony in your relationships.
Comparing to other people never works as we are unique. For example, a man cannot be a woman )or the opposite, even after the surgery in childhood), a person born in a polluted area cannot be compared with someone born in the countryside.
Moreover, all the standards and measures used in comparison to others have been invented and imposed by someone, usually for their, not your, advantage. Think of IQ tests, favouring only some kinds of intelligence needed for making you an efficient robot, not a whole being.
Why? Because intelligence needed in arts, e.g., musical intelligence is discriminated in favour of linguistic, special, or numerical. Sales targets, carbon limits, and social standards are even more brutal examples.
Recommended reading:
10 Steps How to Stop Comparing to Other People
Think of that thought:
"God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players [i.e. everybody] to being involved in an obscure and complex variant of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time." - Terry Pratchett
Start with the first tool to estimate your starting point and then try the rest of the tips described below. Choose the tool which will resonate with you the most or a couple of them, useful in various life areas (e.g., snippets at work, gratitude at home).
1. Identify Your Comparative Behaviours
Meet your starting point. Just answer the question:
How do I have to be better at/than ...?
Analyse your work, friendships, relationships, health, fitness, social standards, and wealth... List all the measures that put pressure on you. Do it in writing in your diary or journal.
After learning the "standards" that put pressure on you, make another list: of how you behave to meet these standards.
For example, you might work harder to make more money to have a higher social status or satisfy your partner's/children's needs (i.e. buy their love and loyalty). You may go to the gym to be fit and impress your partner or friends.
As you can see comparing to others can put complex pressure and more than one standard urges you to make a bigger effort.
2. Use Snippets
They are short statements that are used whenever a negative thought attacks your mind, usually a minority complex or when you underestimate your achievements.
Using snippets is critical in the case of using labels, like “an idiot” or “stupid person”. Stop these statements by using short statements which will cut negativity. Here are some examples of snippets:
Assume nothing!
Hold it! No comparisons!
Check it out.
3. Instead of Comparing Focus on Your Achievements
The truth is that no one will ever totally be in your shoes, your life path is unique. Hence instead of comparing with other people, focus on your personal growth. Yes, growth, means that you do need to improve your standards - but for yourself, not to please others and their standards.
You have everything you need to accomplish excellent goals despite personal challenges like an illness. For example, driving is not allowed in the case of epilepsy, so your mobility is limited somehow, and you are more dependent on other people.
However, you can use the power of thoughts to attract helpful people and achieve your goals.
You may say that being the best is necessary for other people (e.g., generating as high sales revenue as possible in your corporation). To keep up your work or survive financially, you may have to be the best, but always remember that money is not everything in the world. You will find people who will be grateful for what you are doing. And that is your success.
Never underestimate your past successes. Whether you are a doctor, writer, musician, mother, or student, you have a unique perspective backed by unique experiences and gifts.
You can love, serve, and contribute.
Find motivation in them to pursue more. Take your journal and diary and list a minimum of 50 achievements that you have made during your life - and always add more items.
Recommended reading: 10 Tools You Should Use to Stop Comparing with Others
4. Compete, Less
Appreciate more. Competition is appropriate in some cases, like business and work to generate profit. However, life is not all about competing with others. The sooner you stop this practice to “win,” the faster you can start working together to figure it out.
The first step in overcoming the habit of competition is to appreciate routinely and complement the contribution of others. Cooperate more, and learn how to synergise. And never compete with your partner, children or friends.
Every time you want to be the best by buying a new car, gadget, or piece of clothing, ask yourself:
Who do I need to prove my value by buying it? Is this thing really necessary in my life?
5. Practise Gratitude
It is not the first time I have mentioned the importance of gratitude which always forces you to recognise the good things you already have in your world.
Start a gratitude journal. Every day write some blessings, even if they might repeat. It is never enough to be grateful for being healthy or having a roof over your head.
Recommended reading: 13 Ways to Be Grateful in Your Life
6. Remind Yourself That Nobody Is Perfect
Focusing on the negatives is rarely as helpful as an emphasis on the positives. What might help you here is to remember that nobody is perfect, and nobody is living a painless life.
It is said that to succeed you need to face obstacles. And everybody is suffering on their own, whether you are close enough to know it or not.
Recommended reading: Perfectionism? Tame It In 15 Simple Steps
7. Find Inspiration Without Comparison
You might know that it is foolish to compare your life with others because it is much wiser to find inspiration and learn from them.
Work hard to learn the difference., humbly asking questions of the people you admire or reading biographies as inspiration.
But do not copy them blindly. Your life is different from theirs. Remember that the great people today have also started somewhere and have been struggling with similar challenges as you.
Recommended reading: 10 Tools You Should Use to Stop Comparing with Others
8. Be Kind to Yourself
When you are kinder and less harsh with yourself, you will encourage yourself to go the extra mile and try harder. Understand that you are in control of your life. I am aware that it is tough to resist comparing yourself to others.
But you make choices to lead your life in a particular way. You make decisions that are best for you, not for anybody else.
Remember that it is not important what other people do or have. You are the one that matters in the course of your life as they cannot live for you – breathe your lungs or walk with your legs.
9. If You Need to Compare, Compare with Yourself
Remember this motto anytime when the negative thoughts of comparison come to your mind. Be the best version of yourself.
Set some ambitious but achievable goals which will be pursued not because of pleasing others, but for your satisfaction.
Remember that even if you are the best at something today, tomorrow someone else will take over you and the chase will never end.
Recommended reading: How to Be a Master of Setting Achievable Life Goals
How do you stop comparing yourself to other people? Share your experience, by leaving a comment. Thank you and have a nice day.
10. Meditate
Meditating will help you to believe in your uniqueness and worth. We are all equal to God. During meditation, you can also find helpful beings so that pursuing your goals will be easier.
Moreover, you will also find some ideas of what to improve. And it is possible to create achievements, too.
Let's meditate together
Connect by telepathy during meditation on Saturdays at 8 pm GMT. I will meditate with you and other people so that our joint energy can create miracles. Send your intention to the Universe. Transform your life and the world.
More about meditation
In a Nutshell
Today you have learnt how to stop comparing with others and why it is so harmful. What to do? Be grateful, be the best version of yourself, pursue goals for your own satisfaction, stop competing, be kind to yourself, practise compassion, and use snippets. practise at least one of the tools described in this article and your life will change dramatically. Good luck. With lots of love and light,
Vicky
About
Vicky is an experienced holistic writer and coach who inspires, motivates, and encourages everyone to become the best version of themselves - physically, mentally, and spiritually.
DISCLAIMER
The content of Awaken Happy Life is published for educational and informative purposes only. It does not substitute medical or any other professional advice. Please seek professional care if you believe you may have a condition. The author of Awaken Happy Life is not liable for any consequences of applying any piece of advice published on this website by the reader.